Merdeka! Merdeka! Merdeka!

So tomorrow is a public holiday, Malaysia National Day. Malaysia is 47 years old.

My company just declared a half-day off. So I am going back soon!! Good also, can miss the jam later.

So for all Malaysian, Selamat Menyambut Hari Merdeka ke47.

Merdeka! Merdeka! Merdeka!

Congratulations!!

It was like the entire Malaysian (and elsewhere as well) blog community is having this baby. Over the past few weeks we have been left on the edge of our seat, the anticipation, the nail biting and all, following the development of James and Mae, and most important Baby Jesse. And the big question on everyone's mind, "When will the baby arrive?"

Then on August 26, 2004, James declared "It's Now!" (yeah, James has still the time to blog at 4.30am). Everyone got excited! It was the time everyone was waiting for. Every now and then we will check out the website for an updates. Mami must have clicked on LoopyMeals like a hundred times, just to find out how's the father, mother and, of course, the baby is doing.

We are taking this to congratulate James and Mae on their new baby boy, Jesse, and also becoming new parents themselves. All the best!!

Here's a champagne for both of you!! *opening an imaginary champagne* ha ha ha like you said, it's the thots that counts!

The Race

I got this in my mail box today. Which really, really hit us right smack on the head!

Once upon a time, there was a Malaysian Rowing Team. To prove that Malaysia Boleh, there will be an annual rowing competition against the Japanese Rowing Team. It was agreed that each team to be made up of 8 men.

After months of intensive training, the race began.....

.......and the Japanese won by .......... 1 km.

Malaysians were furious by the teams dismal performance. The top management decided to win the race next year at any costs. So they established a team of analysts to observe the situation and recommend an appropriate solution.

After several detailed analysis and investigation, the team of analysts found that the Japanaese had 7 rowers and 1 captain.


Of course the Malaysian team had 7 captains and ........... only 1 rower.


Facing such a critical scenario, the management team showed an unexpected wisdom: they hired a consulting company to resstructure the Malaysian team.


After several months, the consultants came up with the conclusion that there were too many captains and too few rowers in the Malaysian team. A solution was proposed on this briliant analysis. THE STRUCTURE OF THIS TEAM MUST CHANGED !!!

As of today, there will only be 4 captains in the team, led by 2 managers and 1 top-manager, and one rower. Besides this, they suggested to improve the rower's working environment and to give him higher competencies.


Next year the Japanese Rowing Team won by 2 km.

The Malaysian team immediately displaced the rower from the team based on his unsatisfactory performance.


But the bonus award was paid to the management for the excellent motivation the team had shown during the preparation phase.


The consulting company further prepared a new analysis, which showed that the strategy was good, the motivation satisfactory, but the used tool had to be improved.

Currently the Malaysian team is designing a new boat.

Malaysia mana Boleh!!

Ant Attack Part 2

My house looks like a war zone and stinks! We have poured insecticide and emptied cans of mortein into the store room. We dare not enter the room now because it stinks and poisonous too.

But it was a mistake. From what mdmafia told us, we should have done nothing and wait for the pest control expert to eveluate the damage and to find a way to kill the colony, especially the queen. Wow! Sounds like a chapter from the Aliens (Alien Part 2).

So by putting insecticide, now the termites has abandon their stations and gone underground. So now there's no way we could find out where the colony is. *sigh*

Anyway, I will engage pest control service, and hopefully they could do something about it. There is a new system, which according to them is very effective (of course it is effective, they are selling it, and not to mention expensive as well). Let's see how lor...

Ant Attack

The nightmare of every house owners. Termites.

Last Tuesday, I was preparing to leave for work when I stepped on something dust/sand-like substance in our store room beneath the staircase. I didn't pay much attention to it, thinking it was dust. But when I stepped on it again few moments later, I decided to check it out.

To my horror, termites has decided to invade my store room. I have a few bags of clothing and some souvenirs from China, including a wooden framed stitch-work and a framed metal bells. Both were damaged. Arrghh...... Thinking that only the two bags were affected, we left for work.

That night, when we came back we decided to check out other things in the store room. OMG. It was like the whole colony was in my little store room. They must have been there for quite some time. It just that we didn't noticed it since it was actually behind some cabinets. We have to remove the cabinets to realise how serious it was. Two of my cabinet racks were damaged, a shoe rack, some boxes have been eaten by termites, some books as well, it was an ugly sight.

So for the last 2 days we have been battling with termites, cleaning up the store room, and our stuff in there. Few cans of insecticide has been emptied. Our living hall looks like a war zone now. We have moved everything out of the store room and put them in the living room. It's amazing how many stuff that the little store room can store. It was fortunate that some of the important documents were left uneaten. And the battle is not over yet.

Looks like our wallet will become lighter few thousand ringgit. *sigh* Gonna look for pest control service.... *sigh sigh*

Test

Hmmm...let's do a bit of a test here.

U see, Mami department is currently working on a tender. They received it on last Friday, 20 August. The due date is 12 Sept, which is a Sunday, and they have to submit the document to the client somewhere in Europe. Since it's a Sunday, the document has to reach there by Friday 10 Sept.

During the kickoff meeting, Mami's boss mentioned that they need to check the courier services to submit the document to Europe, especially how long does it take to deliver the document to the client. The courier service came back and says that the document has to be passed to them by 7 Sept and will reach 10 Sept. So far so good.

Also in the meeting, the same boss also hinted "OK, if we couldn't make it on time, then someone will have to fly there to submit the document." *wink wink*

Now the team is working their heads off to meet the deadline, and according to Mami, they could easily meet the deadline. But among the team, there is a 'story' going on. What they feel is that the boss is trying to make things difficult, and trying to delay the work. 5-6 quotations were requested by the boss, instead of the normal 2-3. Everything has to be triple check. There is always something wrong somewhere in the writeup. And the boss is not really putting effort into the work (as always).

So, let's see how it goes and how it will turn up.
A] The work is completed on time (with some late nights, of course) and submitted to the client on time.

B] The work could not be completed on time and someone has to fly to Europe to submit the document to the client. This someone would probably stayed a week or more for 'site survey' and 'marketing trip'.

Convoy Part 2

Not again. Cheh!!

This morning around 8.45am, while travelling to work on the NKVE, we met with another Merdeka convoy. This time it was scooters. There must be about 100 scooters with a police outrider in front and a few big army trucks following behind and a couple of Perdanas and Kembaras.

They were travelling about 60 km/h (!!) on the highway and with no one to guide the traffic (except for the one police outrider in front), it was chaos.

Initially we were joining the NKVE from the Elite highway (near the Bukit Jelutong intersection), when we stopped for the convoy to pass thru. The convoy must have stretched over a distant of 300 metres. When the convoy have passed, we continued on behind the convoy.

The convoy being at the left most lane and travelling at a crawling speed of 60km/h, cars started to overtake them from the 2 right most lane, including us. We were travelling in the middle lane. It wasn't long before we realise "Ooopss....something's wrong". You see, we were right about in the middle of the convoy, they were on the left, we were on the right, and our turning is about 100 metres away. We can't wait until the entire convoy pass us, that would mean to stop right in the middle of the highway. So we slowed down a bit to wait for the right chance to get to the left safely.

There was a big gap between a Kembara and a Perdana who were part of the convoy. So I signaled to the left. The Kembara ( yeah, f**k you too, B** 5803) realising that she was way behind and I was between her and the Perdana, stepped on her gas, and tried to overtake me. She was tailgating me and honking furiously, and I can see her on my rear-view mirror cursing the hell out of me. WTF? Several time she tried to overtake me and force me to the emergency lane. I signaled to her that I wanted to exit the highway and turn left. Mami said, "why don't you give her the standard Malaysian greeting?". I kept my cool. At the end, I managed to exit, and I can see many more cars were stuck in the same position. A Honda City stopped right in the middle of middle lane. I really hope no major accident happen.

Which got me thinking. Why can't they organise this when there is less traffic rather than the time when everybody is rushing to work? Why can't they manage the traffic more proffesionally and safely? And there should be more police to manage the convoy.

Convoy

Last Monday, while we were travelling home to 3K land, I decided to follow the toll-free route which is much closer compared to my normal toll route. Suddenly out of nowhere, a convoy of big bikes appeared with their engine revving, honking like nobody business. In front, was a police outrider, clearing the road for them. It was for some Merdeka celebration. And it was chaos.

It was around 6pm, and it is when 3K land has the most traffic (3K land is also well known as a big toll-free intersection between Federal Highway, Kesas, LDP, and Elite). Cars everywhere was trying to squeeze themselves in every inches available to avoid this convoy. And these big bikers (there must be hundreds of them) are not being considerate either. They simply zig-zag between cars, dangerously, along this already packed road.

There was one big-fat not-so-bright biker stopped his stoopid bike in front of an Unser to block the car, so that other bikes can pass thru. But what he didn't realise was that behind this Unser was a police car and an ambulance (sirens blazing) that was supposed to accompany them. So they got stuck as well.

What I don't understand is who is the person so smart that he/she arranged the convoy to start at that hour. Everyone knows at that hour it's after-office hours and everyone is trying to get home and the traffic is horrendous, anywhere in Klang Valley, especially 3K. And it was not even 31 August. In the end, I got stuck in the jam and reached home an hour later. Cheh!!

Pratical Joke on Airport

I got this in my mail box today and it was damn funny! But I couldn't find a place to upload it *sigh*. So I did some searching (googling?) and found the joke on the net.

Apparently, two guys pulled this one on London's Heathrow Airport. They wrote down some strange names on a piece of paper, and pretended to be looking for these people. They asked the airport Information Centre to page for these people on the Public Announcement system.
Then one of the guy would hang out beneath the PA speakers and recorded the announcement.

In order to make it as believable as possible, they dressed up as chauffeurs, pretending to be looking for these people, and normally about 40 minutes after a Thai Airways or Air India flight had landed. They acted as if they could not pronounce the names themselves, so as not to reveal the joke, but just handed over a note with the names printed on it and asked the employee at the Information Center to page for them.

After the fifth announcement, they had to leave Heathrow as airport security kinda figured out what was going on. The last recording was done in Gatwick Airport.

My favourite? The first one and the fifth one.

Pop quiz

1. You and your boss has just finished a meeting at a customer place in KL and was travelling back to the office. Upon reaching the office, at the car park floor, your boss parked his car and suddenly realised that he had left his close-to-10K new laptop in the meeting room. Do you...
A] Simply smile at him, showing that you are concerned
B] Understand that he is a busy and stress man, so forgeting things is a norm.
C] Tell him to just jump down from 4th floor of the car park building, head first.

2. So now your boss has realised that his laptop was left at the meeting room. What did he do?
A] Tell you to go back to the office first, he will pick it up himself.
B] Call and ask the customer to keep the laptop for him, so he could pick it up later in the day.
C] Beg you to come along with him and accompany him to get his laptop at the customer's place, leaving a whole load of work at your desk for this very important trip.

3. So after much begging, you finally followed him to get his laptop. When you and your boss arrived at the customer place, your boss....
A] Tells you to stay in the car and he will go get the laptop.
B] Tells you to come with him to get his laptop before going for tea.
C] Tells you to go get the laptop and be ridiculed by the customer, while he relax in his car.

Answer: [ 1. A (no, not C, unfortunately) 2. C 3. C] highlight the space between [ ]

BTW, that's Mami's boss.

First fall

Last Saturday Yiyi had her first accident/fall. :(

We didn't know how it happened, and it happened so fast. Yiyi was playing and running around in her walker. Mami was taking care of her while I was doing the dishes in the kitchen.

I asked Mami to shower first, and I would look after Yiyi after I finished cleaning up. So she brought Yiyi to the kitchen, so I could keep an eye on her. It is actually safe in the kitchen. We have put everything that can be of danger to Yiyi out of reach. She have been in the kitchen numerous times, no problem at all.

Once Yiyi was in the kitchen, Mami went to get some stuff in the living room. I was still cleaning up at the kitchen sink. Then suddenly "Bum! Thud!". I quickly turned towards the sound behind me. And I heard Mami screaming from the living room. Both of us rushed to Yiyi.

Her walker had toppled, lying on its side, with Yiyi still in it. Her head had knocked onto the concrete floor, her body twisted by the walker, with her legs in the air. And she was crying!!

She was crying, which is a sign she is still responsive and conscious. We picked her up slowly, and Mami quickly hold her in her trembling arms. I can see Mami's tears building up in her eyes.

Yiyi was still crying, loudly. We tried to calm her down with every tricks we know. The teddy bear, the rubber ducky, TV advertisements, the ceiling fan.... everything that we know that would draw her interest. When she finally calmed down, I checked her for physical injuries. With Mami still holding her, and Yiyi sobbing, I checked her forehead. Her right forehead was blue-black-ish, beginning to swell. "Buah Duku" Mami said. Then I checked her arms and legs, body and neck for any injuries. By lightly pressing her arms, legs and body, and if she responded by crying or any signs that she is in pain, then she is injured. Luckily she is fine.

My brother dropped by my house 10 minutes after that, and Yiyi was laughing when she saw him. Jumping and kicking in Mami's arm. Another good sign. We then put her to sleep, while watching for any signs of nauseatic or vomitting. When she woke up, we put a warm towel over her swollen forehead to subdue the swelling.

Later we found out that it was a piece of cloth/floor mat that was stuck under the walker that caused the walker to topple. I think that she was travelling to fast in her walker. The floor mat got trapped under the wheel and because the weight is heavier on top (her body and her head), the walker, with Yiyi in it, just toppled.

Being in this kind of situation it is important to remain calm. Carefully remove the child from the accident area and away from danger. Try to calm her down and don't let the child get into shock. Talk to the child, calm her down. Check for any injuries, arms, legs, body, neck, back. If bleeding, try to stop the bleeding and goto the nearest hospital. Also watch out for any sign of head injuries such as vomitting and feeling nauseatic and giddiness. And always have a first aid kit at home. You never know when you need it.

100

Woo hoo!! My 100th post!!

Mami : Yea! Yea!
Yiyi : mum mum...mum mum...

It has been 2 months since I started this blog, and now it's my 100th post.

So how do I feel about blogging? Hmmm...let's see...
It's fun, very interesting, and a good stress reliever! I enjoy every minute of it (which I hope you do to), and as much as I enjoy reading other blogs.

So will I keep maintaining this blog? Well, ya! For as long as I could. At times, my workload will got to me but nevertheless, I will find time to blog.

To all out there...a big Thank You from Papi, Mami and Yiyi!

Bird Flu Outbreak

In a northern state .....

Reporter : Sir, so now the H5 virus has spread to Malaysia?

Agro hotshot : Yes, we believe that it is the N1 strain. Of the 103 ayam kampung bred by the villagers, only two have been infected.

Reporter : So, what actions have been taken to curb this?

Agro hotshot : We have decided to cull all the chicken today. Semua sekali. But to ensure that we really curb the virus, we will cull everything, chicken, duck, bird, everything.

Reporter : Everything?

Agro hotshot : Yes, everything. *eyeing the kuli transporting the birds and shout* HOI! itu itik jangan masuk lori, itu masuk saya mya kereta lar! Aiya.

Reporter : Err...so how long is required to curb this outbreak?

Agro hotshot : Three weeks. All are people are ready. Three weeks.

Reporter : How about the report that our neighbours will ban the import of our chicken?

Agro hotshot : This is an isolated case. We have nothing to hide. Anyone who wants to report to ACA or the police can come and check. We are not stopping anyone, our doors are always open. They can come and take the documents and after that, we will just stop all our work.

Reporter : A few people has been quarantined as well?

Agro hotshot : Yes, just a safety measure. These people have not been changing their sarong since 1998. We are worry for them. We advise all people to change their underpants frequently to prevent your bird from getting the flu.
*eyeing the kuli again*
HOI! brapa kali mau cakap? itu itik masuk saya mya kereta sana!!

Bird Flu

Malaysia has today announced that the H5 strain of bird flu had been found in Kota Bharu, Kelantan. Reported by NEWS.com.au, the director-general of the vet services said they have yet to determine the type of the H5 virus, being N1 or N2 the deadly type.

So it is important for personal hygiene and it is advised to be clean at all time. Also ensure that you change your underwear everyday, so that your bird don't get flu.

:P

Funny Pictures

Together with my earlier post, the plane crashing joke, here are some pictures of the pandai-est US president in the history. I am not sure whether these are doctored pictures, but it's damn funny.


"Oh God! ..... Can't he just shut up..."


"Oooooo.......oohhhhhh......."


"which paragraph is this kid reading? Darn.. I don't see it in this f**king book...????"


"Yeeahh...I see that....there's Osama, right there. And there's Saddam."

Joke

Got a funny one in my mail box today:

A plane is about to crash. There are 5 passengers on the plane and there are only 4 parachutes.

The first passenger says:

"I am Ronaldo, the best football player in the world. The football world needs me, and I cannot die on my fans."
He grabs the first parachute and jumps out of the plane.

The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, says:

“I am the wife of the former president of the United States; I am the senator of New York and I have a good chance of being president of the United States in the future.“
She grabs a parachute and jumps off the plane. 

The third passenger, George W. Bush, says:

“I am the president of the United States of America. I have huge responsibilities in the world. Besides, I am the smartest president in the history of my country and I can‘t shun the responsibility to my people by dying.“
He grabs a pack and jumps off the plane.

The fourth passenger, the Pope, says to the fifth passenger, a young school boy:

"I am old. I have lived my life as a good person and as a priest should and so I shall leave the last parachute to you; you have the rest of your life ahead of you."

To this the little boy says:

“Don‘t fret old man…..

There is a parachute for each of us!

The smartest president of America took my schoolbag....."

Government Tax

Yesterday, it was reported in Bernama and also in The Star that Lennard will be getting RM35,000. Screenshots also picked up the news.

Today, The Star reported that Lennard is only getting RM34,600. Looks like someone is RM400 richer!!

Game over

All our badminton players are out! Semua balik!!

Wong Choon Hann was sent tumbling out by Taufik Hidayat, 15-11, 11-15, 9-15.

No.1 ranking Lee Wan Wah-Choong Tan Fook lost to Korean pair Lee Dong Soo-Yoo Yong Sung 15-11, 11-15, 9-15.

And Malaysian Open champ Lee Chong Wei lost to Chen Hong 11-15, 15-3, 12-15.

Porn Surfing

Someone was porn surfing in the office yesterday (or maybe the day before). How do I know? The fella printed some porno pictures on the printer. A female colleague was collecting some printouts from the printer and she found a few pages of porno in the tray.

Porn surfing in the office is wrong. In some companies, if found guilty, the employee can be terminated with immediate effect. Other people can also sue you for sexual harrassment. But printing porno material is disgusting.

We didn't know who did it, but around mid morning, the fella has got it from the printer.

Punctuality

Yesterday in the office...

Mami's Boss : Tomorrow we have a meeting with at the customer's place. We will be discussing .... blah blah blah...

Mami's Colleague : OK.

Mami's Boss : So , we need to prepare this and that....blah blah blah....

Mami's Colleague : OK, no problem.

Mami's Boss : Let's go together, we will meet at the office first.

Mami's Colleague : Sure. What time?

Mami's Boss : We will meet at the office at 9.30am.

Mami's Colleague : OK. What time is the meeting?

Mami's Boss : 9.30am.

Mami's Colleague : *?????*

World Record?

This is very confusing. I read in Jeff Ooi's Screenshot that our swimmer Alex Lim has broken the world record for Men's 100m backstroke.

Sure enough, if you follow the link you will get to this information in Yahoo Olympic website.



But how can you break a world record, and not win a gold medal?? hmmm...actually it is possible. He did great in the heats but failed in the semi finals.

If I remembered correctly (and confirmed by news report in The Star), Alex has failed to qualify for the 100m backstroke final, clocking 56.08 secs. His national record is 54.77 secs. His best time in the heats was 55.22 secs.

Maybe Yahoo made a mistake. But I am still hopeful, a Malaysian swimmer broke the world record, yea!. Doesn't matter he didn't win the gold medal.

Azalina : Ya ke? Diorang tak cakap pun, tak bagi tau pun. Bila tu?

Merdeka Celebration

Merdeka Celebration for 10 minutes....

1. No sex for 10 minutes.
All couples intended to have sex from 11.55pm on Aug 30 to 12.05am on Aug 31 are encourage not to do so. They are encourage to stop whatever they are performing, cry out "Merdeka" (No, not "Oh yeah, baby!") seven times, then sing NegaraKu, as the Jalur Gemilang is raised. Everyone should stand erect facing the pole. No, not 'that' pole, the flag pole. IF you cannot find a flagpole, switch on the TV.

2. Stop 'yamcha' for 10 minutes.
All mamak shops are encouraged to stop accepting orders and stop serving food and drinks for 10 minutes from 11.55pm on Aug 30 to 12.05pm on Aug 31. During this 10 minutes all patrons are encourage to stand up and cry out "Merdeka" seven times, then sing NegaraKu as Jalur Gemilang is raised. All mamak shop operators and their staff are advised to join in the celebration and sing along with the patrons. Those who didn't know how to sing NegaraKu shall be deported back to India.

No, just kidding. We love you all and we will not be deporting anyone back to India if you don't know how to sing NegaraKu.

3. Stop the Internet for 10 minutes
The Internet will be stopped for 10 minutes from 11.55pm on Aug 30 to 12.05am on Aug31. All Internet connections will be disconnected and disabled. All web surfers, bloggers, online-chatters are encouraged to use this time to go out in the open and shout "Merdeka" seven times and then sing NegaraKu. For those who doesn't know the lyric, you can download it here. Print it out and bring it along with you. Also the 10-minute closure of the Internet will allow you to have your dinner, bath, clean your room, and chat with your parents.

Once the 10 minutes Internet closure is over, you should be able to connect back by reconnecting. If unsuccessful, please retry 10001 times before calling the support telephone line. If no one picks up your call, it means the staff is still out there crying out "Merdeka". (Or maybe they are stuck in the jam because of the closure of the toll booths).

Selamat Merdeka Malaysia!!

Pusing

Itu hari cakap:

"Bolehlah kalau BPR mahu menyiasat projek ini, kita akan memberhentikan semua kerja membaiki jalan itu sehingga selesai siasatan. Kita jangan buat apa-apa kerja, kita tunggu sampai dia siasat. Macam itu jalan ini tidak boleh dibuka dalam masa tiga bulan."

Ini hari cakap:

.... the agency(ACA) made the request on Saturday and did not expect the investigations to affect the repair work schedule because the ACA would take only “a short time”.

Repairs could still be completed within three months because the engineers are prepared for the work, he added.

Soruce: The Star Online, Berita Harian.

Not another Nuri..

What?! Again?! A Royal Malaysian Air Force Nuri Helicopter has gone missing after taking off from Miri Airport in Sabah Sarawak. The destiny of the 10 on board is still unknown. This must be the ten millionth occurence of a Nuri dissaperance. I thought all the Nuri has already crashed in the jungle in Sabah Sarawak. So I guess RMAF must have a gazillions of Nuri with them.

Let's pray that all on-board survive this tragedy, and the rescuer got to them as soon as possible.

Update: The ten have been found. They managed to make radio contact with RMAF base and effort is now underway to get them out of the jungle.

Update 2: Only seven survived the crash. The three who died include the pilot, co-pilot and another soldier. My deepest sympathy and condolene to the families of those who died in the crash.

Shopping for toys

We spent the last Friday searching for a toy for Yiyi. So we went to Toys 'R' Us in Subang Parade. After searching up and down, high and low, we found nothing that we like (yeah, we are paying for it, so it has to be something we like, ha ha ha).

And there are so many of them. There are toys that are suppose to develop baby's motor skills. Toys that teach the baby to learn shapes and colors. Toys that teach the baby ABC and 123. With so many choices, we got confused.

Papi : How about this Shape Sorter?

Mami : Any music?

Papi : No.

Mami : How about this Melodic Story Book? For 18 months and above.

Papi : Huh? 18 months woh? She is now 10 months only leh...

Mami : Can last longer mah...he he he

Papi : No lar. OK, OK, how about this? Gundam Mobile Fighter Action Figure: Burning Gundam? *wink wink*

Mami : Huh? Eh you wanna die ah?

Papi : he he he ...for me lah...

Finally we left Subang Parade empty handed. But in the evening, we went to Mid Valley Toys 'R' Us, since we were having dinner there with our friends/ex-college mates/ex-housemates. We went for a quick look at the store. There we found it.



It's a wheeled telephone with a flipping phonebook of cat, horse, duck, puppy and a pig. OK, a non-halal toy. Everytime u flipped the phonebook, the animal on the card will sound: meow meow, woof woof, oink oink, and a melody will play.

Pressing the digits and the telephone will say the number. Lifting the handset, the phone goes "Hello!", putting down the phone goes "Good Bye!". Quite fun.

How did she like it? When we showed it to her, she started jumping and pounding on the toy. She likes it a lot!

And we are 80 ringgits poorer.

Last last last chance

"Aiya, don't worry lar, sure got chance one!"
"Never mind one, tomorrow still can lar"

Only in Malaysia we get a last, last, last chance. Look at Malaysian Idol. Top 30 became Top 33. Extra 3 were selected from the 'rejects'. Then last 11 became last 12. 1 more were selected from the wildcards. Last chance mah.

Then Akademi Fantasia 2. Best 5 students became best 6 students. Aiya give last chance lar.

If everything also last, last chance, when do we ever learn? Look at MyKad. Next year only expires, still long to go. When expired, people will say, don't worry, sure extend some more.

Look at the NS. 4269 NS dodgers. And this was after numerous of last chance given to them again and again and again and again....

The list goes on and on...Traffic summons, TouchnGo on all highways, the 'drawers' and the warning sign behind the truck, .........

Malaysian has this Tidak Apa attitude. Tidak apa, ada chance lagi. Sure extend punyalah. Why can't they stick to the original deadline? Why can't they stick to the original quota? Just have one realistic deadline and stick to it. If they missed it, so be it, whack them.

Samseng!

A couple of news report in today newspaper really got on my nerves. A minister is threatening and daring ACA to investigate the MRR2 flyover closure due to cracked beams supporting the flyover.
In The Star:

Repair work on the flyover along the Middle Ring Road Two (MRR2) in Kepong will be stopped if the Anti-Corruption Agency (ACA) decides to conduct an investigation into the highway construction project, Works Minister Datuk Seri S. Samy Vellu said.

This, he said, will result in the road being closed for more than the three-month period proposed for repair work to be carried out.
[snipped...]

“Anyone who would like to investigate can come forward, our doors are always open. They can come take the documents and after that, we will just stop all the repair works,” he said. [snipped...]

In Berita Harian:

“Bolehlah kalau BPR mahu menyiasat projek ini, kita akan memberhentikan semua kerja membaiki jalan itu sehingga selesai siasatan. Kita jangan buat apa-apa kerja, kita tunggu sampai dia siasat. Macam itu jalan ini tidak boleh dibuka dalam masa tiga bulan.

“Siapa yang berhasrat melaporkan kepada BPR, tolong lapor. Siapa berhasrat untuk melapor kepada polis tolong lapor, kita tidak menghalang sesiapa pun. Sesiapa nak siasat bolehlah, pejabat kami buka saja, marilah ambil semua dokumen,” katanya.

To ACA, I say take as long as you need and do what ever is necessary. I can tolerate the jam, no problem. But please investigate and if it is proven to be some wrongdoings in the back, catch those blood suckers! Jangan kasi chance!

Note : BPR - No, not Bumiputra Rockers. Badan Pencegah Rasuah aka ACA - Anti-Corruption Agency of Malaysia

Singapore McDonald's

I got this picture in my mail box today. "Why McDonald's in Japan has a higher sales volume than McDonald's Singapore?"



Well, I do agree that a pretty face sells. Look at all the product ambassadors out there. But I also wanted to commend Singapore's McDonald's for their employment policy.

For those who have been to any MacDonald's in Singapore will sure to notice that other than employing hot young teenages as front line, they also have senior ciizens and the disabled, manning the counters. I think this is a good effort by McDonald's to be a responsible employer in Singapore. Not only they provide a way for these people to earn a living, but also they provide a chance for these people to be part of the community. With work, they will have a chance to prove themselves so that they don't feel left out in the fast pace of living in Singapore.

Good job, Singapore McDonald's.

Where Malaysian likes to have sex?

My, my, my. It seems that Malaysian has a thing with having sex in an automobiles. First it was Kancil. It kinda shocked us with the thing you can do behind the backseat of a small and crampy Kancil.

Then a Proton Iswara. A guy was having some after-hours 'driving lessons' with another man's wife and ended up dead, minus his dick. He was apparently attacked by the woman's husband (I got this from Chinese newspaper).

Then today, a school bus. A school bus driver was arrested for statutory rape for having sex with a minor in the backseat of a school bus!

What next? A motorcycle?

Kangaroo?

One day in the land of 3K, while driving back home...

Mami : Eh? here in 3K, where got kangaroo lar?

Papi : Huh?

Mami : You see...*point in front*


"kangaroo next 14 km"

Papi : Ha ha ha... yalar, that one they went to Australia and buy one lar. Then they want to tell everyone they went to Australia lor..

Mami : he he he ....

Papi : Or maybe some brother's girlfriend's mother's maid's sister's son went to Australia and bought them this souvenier lor...

Mami : Eh? like that I want to get some cincaluk botol and hang on our car.

Papi : Huh?

Mami : yalar, we went to Melaka mah...

Papi : *pengsan*

Help needed..

I got this in my mail box this morning, asking for help. If you have the time and money, maybe you can check it out. There are a lot of interesting stuff available, I am sure you will find something that suits you. Maybe something special for your boy's or girl's , gf/bf birthday, or for your anniversary, any occasions.

I attached the email that was sent to me asking for help below:

Nak Minta Tolong

Dear all.....
Terus terang saya sebenarnya malu dan tak sedap hati, tapi bulan ini kedudukan kewangan saya dalam keadaaan tenat. Nak tolong saya tak.?...tolonglah...dengan datang beramai-ramai ke halaman rumah saya hujung minggu ini.....kerana saya akan melelong beberapa barang milik saya yang terbiar. Kalau ada yang berminat.... datanglah biar senang pilih ....saya sertakan gambar barang-barang yang bakal di SALE .... Semua dijual dengan harga kemampuan kawan2 ........janji saya tak rugi sudahlah.... Sebagai seorg KAWAN ,saya harap anda semua dpt tolong saya. Hari ni hari saya , esok lusa saya pulak akan tolong anda Tolonglah !!! Tolong datang yea jangan tak datang...

he he he .... :P

Rojak

So yesterday, after the Yiyi snake-wrestling incident, we went to SS15 Subang Jaya for lunch. We have been spotting this Rojak stall (opposite a Shell petrol station) that has a queue that almost stretched to Great Wall of China (well, almost). So we decided to check it out.

Lucky when we arrived the queue was not that long, it only stretched almost till Vietnam (well, almost).

The stall is a mobile van/lorry stall, selling rojak only. Next to the stall, was another regular stall selling cendol.

I parked my car nearby and joined the queue. It took me about 20 minutes before I could made my order.


Papi : Boss, kasi rojak 3 bungkus.

Boss : Wokay.

Papi : Kasi sotong ah.

Boss : Wokay.

Papi : Telur 2 bijik.

Boss : Saya pun....

OK, I made the last conversation up. Two guys handled the orders from the customers. The dude with the blue apron will take your order, and proceed to serve it in either a plate (for eat-in) or in a plastic bag (for take away). Using a Hatori Hanzo sword knife, he swiftly cut the prawn cracker, coconut cake, egg, and squid into the plate or the bag. Then he passed it to the next dude in the red apron, who will put in sliced cucumber and turnip. For takeaways, he will wrap the whole thing up and put in a bag of pre-packed hot and sweet peanut sauce. For eat-in (well, actually you cannot eat it in the van, you can have it by the roadside), he will simply pour the sauce on to the mixed on the plate.

Judging by the queue, and also the 2 big buckets of peanut sauce, business is good. One of the bucket is almost empty when I got there.



After I got my rojak, I went to join another long queue for the cendol. *sigh*

About spending about almost 45 minutes, I managed to leave the place with 3 packets of cendol on my right hand, 3 packets of rojak on my left hand and a very hungry stomach.

But we were dissapointed.

The taste is not as we expected it to be. It was good. That's all. Nothing special. We have had similar tasting rojak in the past. Same goes for the cendol.

Does it worth the 45 minutes waiting under-the-freaking-hot-sun? No.

Snake Wrangler Baby

Move aside Steve Irwin! Boleh blah, Jeff Corwin! Here comes the Snake Wrangler Baby!!



Yesterday, at Toys 'R' Us...

Papi : Yiyi, look. A snake.

Mami : Eeww....take that away...eeee.....

Papi : He he he, Yiyi, see...snake ....

Yiyi : *Grab snake and twist it*

Papi : Ha ha ha...Yiyi is not frightened...Mami is...

Mami : Eee.......geli lar....eeee

Yiyi : *Twist snake, then tie a knot with the snake*

Note: No actual snake has been harm in the making of this blog entry. OK, maybe a rubber snake.

yet another shot...

Michael've done it. Olivia've done it too. Now it shall be my turn...

I have translated my earlier post - School Magazine, into Bahasa Malaysia. I think my BM teacher wil be proud of me when she read this. Or maybe not. :P

********************************************

Saya kasi bersih saya punya bilik (dulu punya bilik lah) bila saya terjumpa saya punya sekolah tinggi punya majalah. Saya dulu belajar Tingkatan Enam ini sekolah dua taun, tapi saya ada satu majalah jugak.

Semua olang tau, sekolah punya majalah, dia keluar taun taun, dia ada banyak seksyen punya. Satu seksyen ada itu gambar itu sekolah punya aktiviti untuk satu taun, itu gambar ada itu gila-gila punya itu tulis sana, itu editor tulis punya. Lagi satu seksyen ada itu budak budak sekolah punya kerjalah, macam itu kalangan, sajak, katun itu budak lukis punya.

Tapi saya punya paling suka itu blakang punya seksyen, itu persatuan punya gambar dan kelas punya gambar. Jadi saya terus bukak itu blakang punya tempat. Ahh....semua itu bagus punya saya ingat itu sekolah macam semalam lor.

Ada gambar itu catur punya geng, semua itu bodoh-bodoh punya budak, berdiri sana macam itu kayu. Itu taikwandoo punya klab, itu semua kungfu punya olang, dia punya tangan taruk atas dia punya tetek, macam mau makan olang punya muka. Dan itu gimlama klab, itu ayam sana berdiri cantik cantik and manis....(Mami : Batuk...!)

Kemudian saya pegi sana itu kumpul punya gambar, saya punya klas punya lar, itu majalah punya blakang. Itu CCY ada, itu Sam ada, WHow, A-Seh pun ada, tapi saya mana?

Saya betut betut tak picaya saya punya mata. Saya tengok itu gambar lagi. Saya sudah talak ingat saya punya muka kah? Mungkin saya punya kawan sekolah sudah kasi sembunyi kah? Mungkin saya duduk itu depan sana? Mungkin saya ada itu blakang? Tidak, saya talak dalam itu celaka punya gambar. Apo ni?

Saya ada sana cuma dua taun lalam itu manyak bagus punya sekolah, dan saya cuma ada satu saja itu majalah dan saya tadak dalam itu klas punya gambar. Janaga cakap lah, saya sudah bayar sepulu linggit kasi itu cilaka punya majalah. (Ya, cilaka punya lah sebab saya talak lalam itu majalah).

Note: The above is actually not a good translation of Bahasa Malaysia. It is more of a broken Bahasa Malaysia (bahasa pasar).

Shopping

It must be ages since Mami and I went shopping. We went to 1 Utama to shop for some cloths and stuff, yesterday. Yeah, yeah, we got 'saman' (red one) this weekend.

So we went to our favourite shopping centre, 1 Utama. We went to JJ, walked around, window shopping, check out some chicks cloths. Then we went to TGIF for dinner.

Everyone knows that if you have your birthday in TGIF, the crew will come and sing you a couple of Happy Birthday songs, cut the cakes, joke around like monkeys. There were 2 birthday partys last night. So it was quite noisy. No, not because of the kids at the party running around, screaming at the top of their lungs. But because of the horrible singing. OMG. It was awful. The kid, 2 tables from us, was scared shitless when the horrible singing starts. She was clutching to her dad's shirt, with tears swelling in her eyes, refusing to look at the Malaysian Idol wannabe. If Simon Cowell was there, he would have vomitted blood and drop dead right on his Buffalo Wings.

Mami had the buffalo beef rib, I had "World Most Famous Burger". Yeah, world famous but not tasty. We left around 10pm and proceeded to our carpark. We went up to the 2nd floor through the escalator near Reject Shop. And we got shocked. What the hell happen to TGV? Ha ha ha it must have million years since we last visited 1U.

Papi : Where is TGV? What happen?

Mami : Don't know..he he he

Papi : Oh, they just shifted their ticket counter. There....u see.

Mami : Ya, long time never come here already.

Papi : What was the last movie we saw in the cinema?

Mami : Errr....Lord of the Rings?

Papi : Wah! That was like 300 years ago.... I think we have to come out more often..lol

It's true, since Yiyi was born, we seldom have a chance to come out and enjoy ourselves. Everything has changed. Everything revolves around our baby.

But last night, we had some time together. We had some fun and we had a great time. ;)

Note : Saman (Malay meaning a ticket issued by an law enforcement for breaking the law, often traffic violations. Also loosely means a wedding invitation where you are normally obliged to give gifts in the form of angpow - red packet money)

Fever

One fine day...

Relative : Eh? You know ah?

Mami : What?

Relative : When a baby is having fever, actually his brain is developing.

Mami : Huh?

Relative : Ya. When the brain developing, all the activities developed heat. So the extra heat, cause fever lor.

Mami : Sure or not?

Relative : Sure one..I tell you lar...blah blah blah...


At home ...

Mami : Eh Papi, today Relative told me hor, if a baby is having fever, it is actually his brain is developing.

Papi : WTF? Who said?

Mami : I don't know. She said with all the heat generated by the brain development, the baby got fever lor..

Papi : Where got such thing one. I ask you ah....if what she said is true, why do we try to bring down the baby's temperature when the baby is having a fever?

Mami : Err....

Papi : Then might as well, let the baby alone, let his brain 'developed' as much as it can. And when the temperature is too high, the brain get fried, and the baby will go coo-coo.

Mami : Yalor hor....


It is very important to take note when a baby is having fever. When the temperature got too high, it can caused damage to the brain. A fever can come and go in a matter of minutes. A nephew of mine, one minute he was running around, playing with some kids, the next minute he was having seizure with a fever as high as 42 degree celcius.

Some info here and here on fever for babies.

Sex in Kancil

Another Malaysia Boleh record : Having sex in the most cram and tightest space.

It was in The Star today:

PENANG: She was having sex with her partner in the back of her Kanchil when she was rudely interrupted.

Back of the Kancil? What position ah?

Two men were approaching her car, which was parked outside an abandoned factory in Bukit Tengah at 5.15am on Saturday.

On seeing them, the 20 year-old woman, jumped from the back seat into the driver’s seat and sped off - still naked. She did not realise, however, that a motorcycle was parked in front of her car.

She rammed into it. The machine became lodged to the front of her car but she continued driving with it for several miles.

The intruders, as it turned out, were two policemen doing their rounds. They had seen the vehicle shaking quite vigorously and decided to investigate, parking their motorcycle in front of the car.

HA HA HA HA!!!

They later found their motorcycle 6km from the scene. [snipped..]

In a report where Italy bans having sex in the back seat, an Italian shares with us why he did it in the back seat of a car. Luciano di Crescenzio said to BBC news:

... he had never been able to afford to make love anywhere except in a tiny Fiat Cinquecento until he was 30.

He said it had been extremely uncomfortable as his legs always stuck out of the window.

:P

My first visit to StarBucks

We have never been to any StarBucks before. Never. Coffee was never our cup of ...err...tea.

But last week, one of my friend arrange for a get-together-cum-business-briefing session at StarBucks Pyramid.

Friend : Want to come out for 'yam cha' tomorrow?

Papi : Sure..what time?

Friend : About 8pm?

Papi : OK.

So we were all set. As it was 8pm, we guessed that we could have dinner with our friend as well. So we went with there with empty stomach. Big mistake!

We arrived there early, window-shopping. Around 8pm, we made our way to StarBucks, and sure enough, our friend was already there, waving at us. After a brief hello-how-are-you-doing, I proceed to the counter to order some beverages and maybe some food (I was starving). Our friend had had his dinner at 6pm *sighs*. He really meant 'yam cha' only. (I mean who had dinner at 6pm? Ohh wait.....my grandmother does).

The queue was long (almost reach Great Wall of China, well almost), and there were only two jokers manning the counter, and another chief joker running around checking stuff.

At the counter, there were only cakes, but I noticed a tag saying "Chicken Pie".

Papi : OK, I'll have a hot choc, iced choc, an ebony ivory cheese cake and a chicken pie.

Joker 1 : OK. *punch punch on the cash machine and then mumbled something with a fake american accent*

Papi : Huh? What?

Joker 1 : Isthatall, sirr? *louder but still with fake american accent, and trying to look cool*

Papi : Yes.

After paying, I proceeded to the counter where they will serve your order and waited. And waited. And waited. And the crowd was getting larger and larger, and joker no.2, who was preparing the drinks, was taking his own sweet time preparing it, trying to look extra cool. At one point, I thought he was actually dancing! Hey! Alright already, where is my f***ing hot choc?! And yes, they missed my hot choc!

I kinda figure out how they operates. The cashier will take orders from the customer, then he will stick a piece of paper, with a description of the drink' on a cup/glass/mug. Sometime they will write it on the plastic cup with a marker pen. The 'drink maker' will then make the drink based on this piece of paper.

Joker 2 : Sir, you are waiting for...? *coolness was ooozing out of his ear*

Papi : Hot choc.

Joker 2 : OK. How about you? *doing a Justin's turn and ask another customer*

Few minutes later (after a few fling with a couple of hot chicks and some staff who just reported to work) .....

Joker 2 : Sir, can I help you sir?

Papi : *WTF?* My hot choc.

Joker 2 : Ohh....Hey where is the hot choc? *asking joker 1, looking for the empty mug with the paper on it*

Joker 1 : Hey, I put it here. I gave it to you...

Joker 2 : Did not.

Joker 1 : Did to.

Joker 2 : Did not.

Joker 1 : Did to. neh neh neh neh neh.....

Papi : *sigh*...

Finally, I did get my hot choc, but not my chicken pie. Apparently the chicken pie had finished and someone forgot to remove the tag from the display counter. My guess...joker no. 1.

So Mami and I had a cheese cake for our dinner *tsk tsk*, and when we bidded "Ta ta!" to our friend, we were hungry as hell....

Papi : Aneh!! Roti banjir dua, teh kurang manis, milo ais. Kasi sambal lebih ah.

Aneh : Wokay boss!

Advertisement Baby

Yiyi loves to watch advertisements on TV. Everytime any advertisement came on TV, she will basically throws everything down, and then rush to the front of TV in her walker. And then she is in a world of her own, completely glued to the TV. Sometime, if an ads tickle her, she would jump up and down in her walker, laughing.

She seems to know when the ads will come on. When the normal programme resumes after the ads, she will go back to her normal business, 'flying' around in her walker, trying to grab anything she can from the coffee table.

No matter how you call her, or block her view, touch her, her eyes will stay focus on the TV. Try to block her view, and she will scream at you in her baby language.

So yesterday, we did something.



We put her rubber ducky balanced on her head. She was so captivated with the ads on TV, that she didn't care what we did and she didn't moved an inch or else the rubber duck would have fall off. he he he... All of us was laughing , and she still had her eyes glued on the TV with a ducky on her head.

Her favourite ads: Kampung Boy ads on Astro, ads with babies on it and Astro Wah Lai Toi theme song (the one with a red silhouette dancing).

Sick people

I am not sure whether it was reported in the English/Malay newspaper, but this was on ChinaPress Online dated 1 Aug 2004. (Actually I'm a banana, so Mami read it to me :) )

A chinese woman (age 34) who is mentally ill was raped, and abused, both sexually and physically, for the 8 years she was staying in this private mental institution in Cheras, KL. Almost everyday, she was raped, sometime gang rape, and sexually attacked, up to 5 times a day.

She was a bright student in a higher learning institution until she had problems in her relationship with a guy. After he left her, she started to have problems. Her family decided to send her to this institution to take care of her for RM600 per month.

Then the attacks begin.

Initially, she did complaint to her family but being mentally-ill, her family didn't pay much attention (cheh!) to her. The attacks continue. Then recently (after 8 years), her family sensing something was not right, sent her for medial checkups. The doctor who examined her, confirmed she was raped, abused and sodomised. A police report was lodged.

Investigation revealed that she was not the only one. Others in the same institution suffered the same torture and agony. But her mental illness is making investigation difficult and catching the culprits more difficult.

Whether it was the doing of an insider or an outsider, it is sick. What's wrong with these people?! As if she was not sufferring enough from her illness, these people has to bring such torment and misery to this poor woman. Let hope the police do their work and bring these animals to justice.

It actually reminds me of Kill Bill Vol. 1, where the Bride was in coma and she was raped by the hospital assistant and then by another sicko who paid the hospital assistant for the 'service'. I am sure it does happen in Malaysia and this is not the only case. It could happen to hospitals, and private institutions. So if someone in your care complaint of abuse, please do take action.