Monday, August 16, 2004

Merdeka Celebration

Merdeka Celebration for 10 minutes....

1. No sex for 10 minutes.
All couples intended to have sex from 11.55pm on Aug 30 to 12.05am on Aug 31 are encourage not to do so. They are encourage to stop whatever they are performing, cry out "Merdeka" (No, not "Oh yeah, baby!") seven times, then sing NegaraKu, as the Jalur Gemilang is raised. Everyone should stand erect facing the pole. No, not 'that' pole, the flag pole. IF you cannot find a flagpole, switch on the TV.

2. Stop 'yamcha' for 10 minutes.
All mamak shops are encouraged to stop accepting orders and stop serving food and drinks for 10 minutes from 11.55pm on Aug 30 to 12.05pm on Aug 31. During this 10 minutes all patrons are encourage to stand up and cry out "Merdeka" seven times, then sing NegaraKu as Jalur Gemilang is raised. All mamak shop operators and their staff are advised to join in the celebration and sing along with the patrons. Those who didn't know how to sing NegaraKu shall be deported back to India.

No, just kidding. We love you all and we will not be deporting anyone back to India if you don't know how to sing NegaraKu.

3. Stop the Internet for 10 minutes
The Internet will be stopped for 10 minutes from 11.55pm on Aug 30 to 12.05am on Aug31. All Internet connections will be disconnected and disabled. All web surfers, bloggers, online-chatters are encouraged to use this time to go out in the open and shout "Merdeka" seven times and then sing NegaraKu. For those who doesn't know the lyric, you can download it here. Print it out and bring it along with you. Also the 10-minute closure of the Internet will allow you to have your dinner, bath, clean your room, and chat with your parents.

Once the 10 minutes Internet closure is over, you should be able to connect back by reconnecting. If unsuccessful, please retry 10001 times before calling the support telephone line. If no one picks up your call, it means the staff is still out there crying out "Merdeka". (Or maybe they are stuck in the jam because of the closure of the toll booths).

Selamat Merdeka Malaysia!!